Failed.

I failed 2 tests 1 test after 2 years..n it is a terrible one..*edited*
I only have failing papers in my 1st year of Engineering..if i m not mistaken there are 2..one for Process test, another for Electrical test. But I still don't have any failing subject. Will transport phenomena and numerical method be the 1st one?

Everything is considered beautiful for my 2nd year..though there are hardships in between..but the outcome is not so pathetic..Perhaps I did put in more effort? Or is because Year 2 is easy?

Now..3rd year..after 8 weeks..
I find myself a failure..
I almost failed for my separation test before the mid sem break..
N now..I failed for my Transport Phenomena test after the break..
It carries a lot of percentage..If i failed my internal, meaning i'm gonna fail for this subject..which I think I'm already in that particular category..

Failed failed failed..
What has happened to me?
Have I been slacking too much?
Have I tried my best?
Does the new environment cause all the changes in me?
I've tried to stay focus..but there are things that have been distracting me from time to time..
Why can't I be more discipline?
I should be crystal clear about my priorities..
It is my dream come true to study here..it is not supposed to be a disaster..
I seriously cannot continue being like that..
I just feel like isolating myself now..

I've 2 tests coming tomorrow..I really need to calm myself down and stay focus..

I wish every matter still has its turning point..(Is it too late now?)
I hope this is not the end..
I know I have to conquer it..
Nobody can save me, except myself.. This is so hard..=(






Can I go to the beach or top of the mountain to scream as loud as I want?